BDSM stands for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism. It is a sex term that refers to power play in the bedroom. Acts of BDSM may include rope play, slave play, punishment, and more. Dating in the BDSM world can be nerve racking for beginners. Here is some dating advice for beginners.
Research First
Before you start a BDSM relationship you should research the lifestyle. Learning about what it truly means to participate in BDSM is important. What you see in pornography is not a true representation of the lifestyle. Real BDSM is about love and caring.
Read forums and websites to learn more. Articles like this one will also help you to develop a healthy understanding of BDSM.
Learn To Talk
It is important to learn to talk to those who you are going to be within the BDSM world. This allows you to discuss what you like and don't like. That way you can avoid areas of the BDSM world that you don't want to try. You can also ensure that you are on the same page about what you like.
There are other BDSM people out there. You should never be embarrassed. Getting out and meeting others who like the lifestyle can help you to understand and learn. Talk to other couples and see what they like and know. Just be appropriate about it.
Trust Is A Must
BDSM almost always results in losing power for at least one party in the relationship. Any time that you submit to someone in a BDSM dating scenario you should be sure that you trust them. You want to know that they won't hurt you and won't take advantage of you. Establishing trust may take time and energy but it will make the scenarios that much more passionate.
If you are practicing BDSM with someone who isn't your partner, make sure that you at least spend time getting to know them so you can establish a sense of trust. Being safe is key.
Start Small
When you get into the BDSM world, you need to start small and work your way up. With no experience you won't know for sure what you like and what you don't like. Actually, trying something might end up in you discovering that you don't like something.
At the same time, you don't want to push your partner past their comfort zone. One might say that baby steps are the best way to start.
Keep An Open Mind
Not everyone likes the same thing and chances are you and your partner will have slightly different tastes when it comes to the BDSM world. Keep an open mind when it comes to trying new things. Just like everything else you and your partner engage in, you should remember that life is a give and take. You might need to embrace some things they like, just like they will need to do the same for you.
Set Hard Limits
We just talked about having an open mind but that doesn't mean you have to try things that you absolutely do not like. Hard limits are things that you will never try, no matter what. Think about these limits before you try anything and let your partner know that they are not to try anything on your hard limits list.
Have A Safe Word
We already have mentioned that BDSM results in a loss of power and as such you always need a way to stop if a situation goes beyond your limit. This is where a safe word comes in. Having a word such as pineapple to tell your partner you have had enough is a must.
Some people utilize two safe words. One for slowing down and one for stopping. That way you don't have to outright stop if you are just feeling uncomfortable.
Healthy relationships are important and if you like the idea of BDSM you should try it. Use these tips to ensure that you have a safe and fun foray into the world of bondage, domination, submission, and other kinky aspects of sex. You never know what you might end up enjoying. Remember to be safe.